Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen are stupid, Lindsay Lohan is stupid, Lance Bass is stupid.

Hollywood’s most talented former couple, Denise Richards and Charlie Sheen, have resolved their public feud by agreeing to put their daughters into therapy. Method actor Richards – who spent three minutes preparing for her role as a nuclear physicist in The World Is Not Enough – insists on providing a nanny for confessed sexaholic Sheen’s visits. The fate of the girls (incidentally aged two and three) was decided during a six-hour mediation. Or as Sheen would put it, twelve lines.

Lindsay Lohan, fresh from her Summer [Rehab] Camp, has been refused a drink at LA’s Viceroy Hotel. The Parent Trap kid actor – who once had to have her cleavage digitally reduced because Herbie Fully Loaded was a family movie – asked for a vodka and was told by “the waitress that she was sorry but she wasn’t allowed to serve her”, according to the actress’ aides instructions. In related news, apparently Paris Hilton’s reps have issued a statement to the post-pubescent world that they should not indulge in sexual intercourse with the Pledge This star.

Lance Bass, former N ‘Sync crooner and 12-time Celebrity Squares veteran, has admitted getting married to try to score free booze. The one-time Kim Possible star related the story, but stressed that she was “just a friend”. Considering that he is openly gay this isn’t much news. “We wanted to get free drinks all night … we’re like ‘We just got married’ and they’re like ‘Ah, whatever’ … we didn’t get one drink all night”. It seems that lying would have been less hassle.