Tuesday, April 29, 2008

The South Korean modern masterpiece Failan is being remade as an American movie. This is a terrible thing ... the original was pretty perfect and a remake can add nothing.

The man behind this evil is Vadim Perelman, who once brought us the stellar House of Sand and Fog, but is current in theaters with wet blanket The Life Before Her Eyes.

Looking at the IMDB message board for the movie, I am glad someone agrees. Best comment is "DONT DO THIS YOU F++CKING C*(*+S!"

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

So John Mayer was asked to do the theme song to The Bucket List, which is hugely appropriate from a '9th Level Of Crap' standpoint. Check this shit out...



I do want to point out the irony of someone saying, as M. Mayer does at the end there, "Say what you need to say" TWENTY-SIX TIMES IN A ROW!!!

Friday, April 11, 2008

So - that thing that was making me busy is no longer making me busy, so I will no longer be as busy as when that thing that made me busy was still making me busy.

New contributor's first piece... a pseutable suidonym escapes me temporarily, but here goes...

Why Film is Most Definitely a Collaborative Medium

An unfortunate side-affect of my job in film sales requires me to occasionally attend London-based screenings of finished films which are still looking for a sales agent to come on board. Its my experience that, if a film gets to completion without a sales agent on board, there’s usually a very good reason. And that reason is usually because it is very very crap. But that’s a topic for another post.

For now, let me draw your attention to what must surely be the worst of all the films I have ever been made to sit through for professional reasons. Ladies and gentleman, I apologise as I give you Madness In The First Degree.



Now, anyone who was even the smallest amount of knowledge about the way films are made would immediately know that attempting to make a feature film entirely on your own would be a difficult, nay, ridiculous thing to attempt. So I suppose we should give Geoff Searle – MITFD’s producer, writer, director, sole actor, cinemtaographer, editor and composer – some sort of credit. Or we should do, if only the film weren’t such a horrendously self-indulgent waste of time and money. Searle spent 4 years and god-only-knows how much cash making the film, and it is almost entirely unwatchable. Imagine watching a 90 minute long pop video from the early years of MTV. Now imagine doing it whilst grinding your teeth in to the back of your fist because you are so irritated at being made to sit through this nonsense. Somehow, the actual experience of watching this film is far far worse…

Geoff seems like a nice fellow, and I suppose we should be grateful – in case any one of us, in a fit of hideous self-importance, decided that they were talented enough to make an entire feature length film without anyone else’s help, Geoff has been there and proven very definitely that it can’t be done.

Sunday, April 06, 2008

For anyone that knows Alaric, bear in mind that I warned him I would tell everyone...

He has a "great idea for a script". It's a remake of Casablanca, set in a contempotary world with Zombies instead of Nazis.

How does one come up with such an idea. Watching the classic flick, does one articulate the concern that "this would be so much better ... with zombies?"

Crazy.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Yeah so I suck. No updates. Been busy. Wish some of my other writers would say something. I've seen two movies in the last month ... one was unfortunately Doomsday. Fucking Neil Marshall ... soooo good. Once.