Have never been a huge fan of Scotland’s choice for Bond Gerard Butler, but hearing that he hit Hilary 'sWank in the head with suspenders, shutting down filming for five days as she recovered from the four-stitch wound, allows me to forgive him for Joel “Hack” Schumacher’s rendition of Phantom of the Opera. During the shoot for P.S. I Love You the Dracula 2000 star had “been doing this scene for a day and a half, stripping and dancing and then pretending that the suspender hits me in the eye. It got stuck behind me and flew over my head and hit her in the head.” Former Next Karate Kid Swank most incurred my wrath by winning an Oscar for M$B, allowing her the prefix “Two-Time Academy Award Winner” (which is marginally more ludicrous than “Academy Award Winner Ben Affleck”). Knowledge that the tom-boyish vegetarian ex-sister-in-law of Rob Lowe is trying to establish her as a romantic-comic lead can only augment the ill will I feel towards her. Which is plenty.